Harley Davidson V-Rod Forum banner

1 - 10 of 10 Posts

·
Yeah, but what if...
Joined
·
4,714 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
LANGUAGE


1. Do you understand the meaning, but are unable to explain the origin of, the term "died in the arse"?


2. What is a mole?


3. Are these terms related: chuck a sickie; chuck a spaz; chuck a U-ey?


4. Explain the following passage: "In the arvo last Chrissy the relos rocked up for a barbie, some bevvies and a few snags. After a bit of a Bex and a lie down we opened the pressies, scoffed all the chockies, bickies and lollies. Then we drained a few tinnies and Mum did her block after Dad and Steve had a barney and a bit of biffo."


CUSTOMS


1. Macca, Chooka and Wanger are driving to Surfers in their Torana. If they are travelling at 100 km/h while listening to Barnsey, Farnsey and Acca Dacca, how many slabs will each person on average consume between flashing a brown eye and having a slash?


2. Complete the following sentences:


a) "If the van's rockin' don't bother ...


b) You're going home in the back of a ...


c) Fair suck of the ...


3. I've had a gutful and I can't be ******. Discuss


4. Have you ever been on the giving or receiving end of a wedgie?


5. Do you have a friend or relative who has a car in their front yard "up on blocks"? Is his name Keith and does he have a wife called Cheryl?


FOOD


1. Does your family regularly eat a dish involving mincemeat, cabbage, curry powder and a packet of chicken noodle soup called either chow mein, chop suey or kai see ming?


2. What are the ingredients in a rissole?


3. Demonstrate the correct procedure for eating a Tim Tam.


4. Do you have an Aunty Myrna who is famous for her tuna mornay and other dishes involving a can of cream of celery soup?


5. In any two-hour period have you ever eaten three-bean salad, a chop and two serves of pav washed down with someone else's beer that has been nicked from a bath full of ice?


6. When you go to a bring- your-own-meat barbie can you eat other people's meat or are you only allowed to eat your own?


7. What purple root vegetable beginning with the letter "b" is required by law to be included in a hamburger with the lot?


CULTURE


1. Do you own or have you ever owned a lawn mower, a pair of thongs, an Esky or Ugg boots?


2. Is it possible to "prang a car" while doing "circle work"?


3. Who would you like to crack on to?


4. Who is the most Australian: Kevin "Bloody" Wilson, John "True Blue" Williamson, Kylie Minogue or Warnie?


5. Is there someone you are only mates with because


they own a trailer or have a pool?


6. Would you love to have a beer with Duncan?


The people to be granted citizenship are the ones who call it a crock and cheat.


PS The funny thing is, we are running our PC's on Australian English, yet when you run a spellcheck, about half the words in this come up as mis-spelled.
 

·
VRF0RUMS ORIGINAL
Joined
·
5,763 Posts
Karl Scott said:
PS The funny thing is, we are running our PC's on Australian English, yet when you run a spellcheck, about half the words in this come up as mis-spelled.
Kinda like Kaz's posts?
 

·
Yeah, but what if...
Joined
·
4,714 Posts
Discussion Starter #3
Here are the answers:

LANGUAGE


1. Do you understand the meaning, but are unable to explain the origin of, the term "died in the arse"?

Yes, it means something has karked it. The origin is something only a poofter would know.


2. What is a mole?

A mole is a shiela with a mongy head and a personality like Kath or Kim, probably more Kim.


3. Are these terms related: chuck a sickie; chuck a spaz; chuck a U-ey?

Only to the extent that the boss will chuck a spaz if you chuck a sickie and if you see him walking along the street when you're heading for the pub, you better chuck a U-ey, and fast.


4. Explain the following passage: "In the arvo last Chrissy the relos rocked up for a barbie, some bevvies and a few snags. After a bit of a Bex and a lie down we opened the pressies, scoffed all the chockies, bickies and lollies. Then we drained a few tinnies and Mum did her block after Dad and Steve had a barney and a bit of biffo."

Last Christmas Day afternoon we had the family around for a meal, some light refreshments and traditional beef or lamb sausages. After lunch we took some mild soluble headache medication and took a quick nap before we reconvened and opened our gifts, ate chocolates, biscuits and candy. After that we continued to imbibe alcoholic beverages, namely Beer from cans, and our Mother became upset when Dad and my brother Steve argued and became physically violent toward each other.


CUSTOMS


1. Macca, Chooka and Wanger are driving to Surfers in their Torana. If they are travelling at 100 km/h while listening to Barnsey, Farnsey and Acca Dacca, how many slabs will each person on average consume between flashing a brown eye and having a slash?

It usually will take most people a six pack before they will brown-eye on the M1 but anyone called Wanger is probably good to go anytime the car leaves the driveway. Assuming normal bladder sizes however and normalising for different time frames and whether someone has broken the seal before chucking the first brown eye, you would expect about .75 of a carton, or 18 tinnies would be consumed before someone needed to to drain the main vein. A true Australian male can, when seated during consumption without the need to walk and stand at a bar, only be truly satisfied if a full slab is consumed before the need to shake hands with the unemployed arises.


2. Complete the following sentences:


a) "If the van's rockin' don't bother ... KNOCKIN' of course

b) You're going home in the back of a ... Divvy van


c) Fair suck of the ... sav


3. I've had a gutful and I can't be ******. Discuss

Nah, I can't be buggered.


4. Have you ever been on the giving or receiving end of a wedgie?

Only if you are male and went to school sometime in the last 300 years


5. Do you have a friend or relative who has a car in their front yard "up on blocks"? Is his name Keith and does he have a wife called Cheryl?

Yes to the first part, but someone stole the blocks, and it's Wazza's and his shiela is called Charlene.


FOOD


1. Does your family regularly eat a dish involving mincemeat, cabbage, curry powder and a packet of chicken noodle soup called either chow mein, chop suey or kai see ming?

Silly bugger, thats San Choy Bow mate!


2. What are the ingredients in a rissole?

That is a national secret. (ie, no-one really knows) But I know they have magic carrots that only appear after a huge chunder.


3. Demonstrate the correct procedure for eating a Tim Tam.

Do I have a coffee?


4. Do you have an Aunty Myrna who is famous for her tuna mornay and other dishes involving a can of cream of celery soup?

No, but Aunty Gladys uses a can of creamed corn in bloody everything.


5. In any two-hour period have you ever eaten three-bean salad, a chop and two serves of pav washed down with someone else's beer that has been nicked from a bath full of ice?

Every Easter Friday at Uncle Franks


6. When you go to a bring- your-own-meat barbie can you eat other people's meat or are you only allowed to eat your own?

Yeah, like the sucker behind the Barbie knows which friggin' sausage is yours and who brought which steak! Give me a bloody break you silly wanker. It all gets cooked well done and piled on a few plates in the middle of the table and then you try to grab bits that look better than what you brought.


7. What purple root vegetable beginning with the letter "b" is required by law to be included in a hamburger with the lot?

Broccoli. ONLY JOKING! Bloody Beetroot of course. What kind of a wally doesn't know that?



CULTURE


1. Do you own or have you ever owned a lawn mower, a pair of thongs, an Esky or Ugg boots?

3, countless, too many to count, and only one pair, but they're still good after 17 years (maybe a bit whiffy, but I spray them with deoderant)


2. Is it possible to "prang a car" while doing "circle work"?

Actually, it's inevitiable.


3. Who would you like to crack on to?

Nic of course. 'Cept that bum Keith has snagged her now. Mind you, I'd always give one to Kylie.


4. Who is the most Australian: Kevin "Bloody" Wilson, John "True Blue" Williamson, Kylie Minogue or Warnie?

Bloody hell, that lot are a bit hard to split. Let me think - Warnie has turned into a bit much of a wanker these days. Kylie is practically a Pom, and while Kev swears a lot and likes a beer or 20, I reckon Old Mate John is the standout. He sung at Steve Irwin's funeral, so that's good enough for me.


5. Is there someone you are only mates with because


they own a trailer or have a pool?

No. Thats ridiculous. One of them also has a plasma screen in his Titan shed and the other has a grouse tinny we go crabbing in as well.


6. Would you love to have a beer with Duncan?

Not bloody likely, we always drink in moderation and he never ever gets rolling drunk. I don't care what the song says.


The people to be granted citizenship are the ones who call it a crock and cheat.

Well I had to google what a Divvy van was. And EVERYTHING that looks like a test is a crock, that's a well known fact.


PS The funny thing is, we are running our PC's on Australian English, yet when you run a spellcheck, about half the words in this come up as mis-spelled.[/QUOTE]
 

·
VRSCD's Rule!
Joined
·
4,160 Posts
That's some funny shIte Karl!!
 

·
Friend of Max.
Joined
·
21,719 Posts
I don't even understand the answers :confused:
 

·
South Of The Border
Joined
·
60 Posts
Karl; You crack me up :rofl2: After passin' all that a man'd be dryer than a dead dingo's donga!!! 'ere mate you'd better 'ave one on me --> :cheers:

rjrivero: I don't even understand the answers
rj: She's cool mate i've lived here all me life and still don't understand most of it!!!! :D
 

·
Back in Black
Joined
·
212 Posts

·
Yeah, but what if...
Joined
·
4,714 Posts
Discussion Starter #8
I can't get those to open. Never mind, I have seen them before.

Oh, on the wedgie one, I realise I am being a bit sexist.

Being a girl and having your g-string stick out above your jeans when you bend over or sit on a stool at the pub does not count as a wedgie unless someone grabs it and pulls hard enough to give you a front wedgie as well.

Now piss off, I've gotta go move the Torana so I can get the Kingswood out and shift the Camira. If you take a beer leave the money on the fridge.
 

·
Grog
Joined
·
144 Posts
:thumb: spot on
 
1 - 10 of 10 Posts
Top