I can see her point of view. I don't think I would have started riding if the kids were much younger. In fact, I was just about ready to give it up when my DH had his first crash when we were just starting. He was a widower when I met him and I suddenly realized how terrible it would be for his kids to lose another parent (duh...), but he was completely hooked by then, they knew how much it meant to him and decided they would ignore the risks -- but they were 16 & 18 at the time. Our riding especially bothers my daughter who has a chronic illness and has to be more dependent. But when we stopped riding for awhile after his crash and I was such a bear, even she decided it was better for us to continue. At least on separate bikes, the likelihood of us both being wiped out at the same time is less than what your wife went through.
I'm in Central PA, St. College area, but alot of Amish families have been moving up here in the past 10 yrs. They are running out of land in the Lancaster area and the taxes are too high. Land is cheaper up here.
I know LOTS of nice twisty rides up here, if you get up this way.
Val